Its been a good week, and I'm happy I guess. Missing Paul (he's out of town with the Enemy), but busy with work. Just feeling very very very heavy and really struggling with my eating disorder (which has now been classified as an Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified b/c I don't purge anymore). I just want it to be done. To be healthy. And it is more frustrating than I can explain that I just am not.
So for some inspiration (thanks to Demi Lovato for recommending this song- I am a few years older than her base, so I don't know much about her as a star, but I have come to respect her so much for her open struggle with ED and with cutting.)
This is a Christian song, and I'm not really Christian, but I do believe in a strong person relationship with God, and I don't think I ever thought about how that impacted my view of myself. But these lyrics if I really think about them, move me to tears:
I want to hear You say,
Who I am is quite enough.
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful.
xoxo
Princess Kelley
You are beautiful Kelley inside and out. You have a soft golden heart and you are who you are and to everyone who loves you that is all that matters to us.I dont know how others may react but i know how special you are to me and i will never allow you to put yourself down in any fashion.You are loved and cherished and any time you ever doubt yourself think of all those who you have touched and a difference you have made in their lives.
ReplyDeleteLove you
Adam
Yeah, what he said!
ReplyDeleteAs far as the eating disorder issues, for what it's worth, try to look at it differently...instead of being healthy or not b/c you're struggling, take it day by day or even hour by hour...example, I ate lunch and it's staying there so I'm not going to worry about supper until that time comes - for now, for this moment, this hour, I have overcome!
So anyway, hope that doesn't sound dumb...love you, girl! :)
just me
I feel your pain, for I too suffer from a disorder. It's called, "just too good looking." Every day is a struggle, but you inspire me. We'll get through this together. One day at a time.
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