I just got dumped.
I have a paper due in 5 hours, and 4 more in the next 24, along with a final, but Paul decided that he just couldn't stand the guilt that he's been lying (by his own choice) to Sarah Gregory (his lesbian bff) about the fact that he is my Daddy, and since last week, that he is my boyfriend. So he flew all the way up here and then was going to spend the week with me having a blast, and spanking me and "helping" me with my finals... oh and then he was going to dump me. That was his plan all along apparently. And he "didn't mean" to do it at this time, but he just couldn't take the guilt anymore. No problems that he's been a lying S.O.B the whole time. Just now.
Yes Sarah, I know you read this. And I hope you're happy now. I never hated you. I just never wanted you in my life, and I didn't like that you kept interfering and that you were so possessive of a man you have no right to posses. You are a lesbian and could never offer him what I could. And I never once asked him to chose between us. You entered into a non monogamous relationship just as knowingly as I did. And if you truly loved him, you would learn to let him be loved.
So right now I am about to go take as many xanax as is medically allowed and try to forget the last two hours never happened. Seriously I woke up at 8, was frantically writing my paper and he comes downstairs and I start talking to him about how I'm cutting it close but I think I'm going to get it done and I'm going to need to run to the library around 2, and he sits down and says its over. Yeah. That's been my morning.
I gave the man my heart and he threw it in the mud. I doubt if he ever loved me.
I emailed my professors all in one go just explaining what happened and saying I will get it in all as soon as possible. And told them that I won't hold it against them if they have to dock my grade. That I was fighting for cum laude, but that they have all already done so much for me with my depression that I dont' want them to feel like they have to give me more because a boy decided to break my heart.
I love you all, and I will try to make a video soon... I just... I can't stop crying... I just don't know what to do...
xoxo
Kelley
I'm no ones princess anymore
PS. please someone please attack "roger" in the comments on my last post- "his" attack really hurt my feelings.
It's not easy getting bad new when you have to finish up school work. I can attest to that.
ReplyDeleteIt will take some time but you'll be able to move on before you know. Just take it as a sign that you weren't mean to be together. I'm sure you'll be some ones princess before you now it.
Hugs ~Jess XX~
He's an ugly old jerk and, from the sounds of it, a coward too - it hurts now but it's for the best - The more time you spent with him, the more his weakness could've infected you.
ReplyDeleteYou're a winner, a bright and sunny princess who makes even people she's never met smile.
People are gonna hurt you, the easy thing would be to say "Oh it's because they're jealous." Maybe they are, but more likely, they're just selfish idiots who have no idea what they're doing. Try your best to forgive them, and if you can't do that, then just stay away from them. Either way, move on.
I'm saying it like it's an easy thing to do and it's not but learning to do it is an unfortunate part of growing up.
If you don't, then they win. You're too strong to give up. There's people who love you. Make them proud.
I'm sorry you had to go through this during finals. Honestly it' a horrible time to do that to any one.
ReplyDeleteI hope you can take some time away from school and focus on healing yourself. I also hope this experience does not put a bitter taste in your mouth when it comes to these types of relationships.
First, Paul is a coward and a fool who doesn't deserve you.
ReplyDeleteSecond, It's best not to comment too much on "Roger". Either he is never comming back to look for responces or he'll see the responces and think "Isn't it great, they are talking about ME.". He is too shallow to be worth paying any attention to. He should be ignored like an indescretion at the dinner table.
Third, You ARE a princess, you are THE princess, to all of your fans here. Besides you don,t have to be "someone's" princess. You are your own princess, aren't you. You know how amazing and special you are.
Fourth, and possibly most important, BE CAREFULL WITH ZANAX !!! Zanax withdrawl can cause grand mal seizures. I've been there, done that, and I got the Tee-shirt.
You are loved,
Your Alaskan Prince, Chuck.
Kelly,
ReplyDeleteI am sorry for you and the situation is never easy no matter the timing. It was selfish of Paul not to wait until after or for that matter to have let things continue if he was not certain. Honestly Kelly, you are young and could be forgiven for your rashness but Paul, he should know better. Still as I started regardless of the circumstance I am sorry for you and what you are going through.
If you can focus on your work and push forward is sounds trite but the decision alone has positive effects. The brain has the same power to affect positive change as negative.
A. Moro.
No big words, no long texts, just a hearfelt hug.
ReplyDeleteI can understand your post, but you've got one little mistake. You are NOT no ones princess, you are and will always be our, your readers, princess.
Hugs, Adar
It would be bad form for me to judge any of the parties involved, because I just cannot really know the whole situation, from the snippets that can be derived from a computer screen. I think that better timing might have been in order though.
ReplyDeleteI hope that everything gets sorted out in the end.
Prefectdt
Very big hugs, I am so sorry to hear this news, as others have said you are most defiantly our princess and that it was probably a sign that you weren't mean to be together.
ReplyDeleteI can tell you from experience that it does get better and we are all here for you as it does.
Charles
Why exactly are you asking people to attack me? Because I posted my opinions about the way you seemed to treat people on your blog? I'm slightly confused why "his" keeps getting put into quotation marks as if my gender is in question. I assure you, i am not faking who I am, that is YOUR thing, I am simply a man who feels you overstepped the bounds of proper social etiquette. I do not know you personally nor do i know any of these people in question nor have I ever personally talked to you before. I am someone who loves spanking and likes to see good people prosper.
ReplyDeleteYou, however, especially after you write this post berating others for not giving in to "Princess" Kellys demands, are obviously not in that category. I never said anything on your blog after a number of months viewing it up until your last post because up until then I saw you as a victim and felt like you were sincere in wanting to find someone to be with in this lifestyle because this was who I felt you truly were. THEN you post a video of you with this much older dude, who obviously could easily be your grandfather, and talk down to him in writing (aka saying jerkface and the like and how awful he treats you) on a public venue which in and of itself is disrespectful, but as an outsider, I was appalled at the juvenile behavior and higher-than-thou attitude you have begun to put out to your "fans" when you are not even the best looker to be frank.
Now if you were totally insecure about your looks, and you realized you have a nice butt and apparently open legs going for you and not much else, than I could rationalize that it isn't fair to point it out. BUT, instead, you act on here as if you are the most beautiful girl in the world and deserve EVERYTHING and you have, to my knowledge, done NOTHING for anyone else except for publicly take a shit all over anyone who does something you don't like or who pisses you off.
This old man bf of yours was obviously smart to get out when he did, and you can blame it on some lesbian if you would like, but i myself am a smart man, and I am sure the real reason was he realized that you are stingy and spoiled and newsflash: GUYS, ESPECIALLY DOMINANT ONES, DON'T LIKE TO BE TALKED DOWN TO BY GIRLS WHO CALL THEM DADDY, and that is coming from a dominant man who has been in the scene for many many years, so I will give you three little things you should remember that will help you avoid your "heartache" in the future:
1) Treat others the way you want to be treated, because you DO NOT deserve to be treated better than anyone else, sorry to disappoint your unrealistic fantasy.
2) Don't say bad and nasty things about people you have never met and have never talked to in front of their friends, because karma will always come back to bite you in the ass
3) Learn to be appreciative of the things you have, because as you have probably learned today, even princesses don't always get what they want.
Now that I have said my piece, you young immature little thing you, I will NEVER comment on your blog again. I promise, and unlike some, I ALWAYS Keep MY promises. Hope you have a fantastic life when you grow up.
Roger J.
Hey Kelley,
ReplyDeleteYou don't need my "gonna get betters" sweetheart, cause you know deep down it is. You got caught in drams you are going to rise above. I know, it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like crazy now, and honestly, it probably will for a while. The only thing I guarantee though is that you will look back, think of him, roll your eyes and think, ... ugh... stupid... He is, you know, we all know, it just be so. :-)
Buck up Princess Kelley, do what you have to, cry when you have to, be OK with that, and then move on when you are ready.
As for Roger, I think he's just a little cranky pants because his single wide got flooded down in Memphis. Take it from me, with tops pretension only masks crushing insecurity. Consider someone like him is you want your bottom smacked by a dirty flip-flop in a place that smells like cat shit.
Hugs and best wishes,
Michelle
Kelly : /hug
ReplyDeleteRoger : ...actually its not even worth the effort of replying.
Actually wait, "2) Don't say bad and nasty things about people you have never met and have never talked to in front of their friends, because karma will always come back to bite you in the ass"
Your own words.
To Roger,
ReplyDeleteThis is Paul, yes, the evil Paul. Waiting now for angry expletives (at least) to be hurled my way.
While I appreciate Roger's concern for my well-being, I am old enough, thick-skinned enough, and strong enough to handle a little playful teasing from a beautiful young woman. What you didn't see in the outtakes was BOTH of us laughing. I'm secure enough in my own dominance to be able to laugh at myself.
She was, and is, absolutely and wonderfully submissive. She is also brilliant, passionate, and so open to experiences that she risks the most severe of growing pains, something that takes a world of courage.
Adrian said it well, so I'll let that particular statement stand on it's own.
As to her "spreading her legs", you must know that she has refused sex, a principled stand both refreshing and rare. Talk about not knowing what you're talking about! And what a stupid, cowardly thng to say about a young lady!!
I have never heard her refer to herself as beautiful, or even pretty. Like most young women, she is hyper-critical of her body. she hears ME and others saying it all the time, and for good reason.
I am an old dog dominant who did something stupid
and will now be without this beautiful woman's love. I don't mind taking my own shots for my actions, but I'll be damned if I'm going to stand by and let somebody who doesn't even KNOW her take personal, and unwarranted, pot shots at this very special young woman.
Paul (Tubaman)
In my experience random strangers don't dive head first into something like "Roger" has. There is always more to it than that. Anyone that watched the clip without an agenda realized it was a humorous exchange. Those of us that have lived this lifestyle away from a computer screen realize too that it's not only possible... but it is appropriate... for their to be lighthearted humor in a relationship... even in a D/s one.
ReplyDeleteKelley is as sharp as a tack and can keep you on your toes, and she can be a big brat when she wants to be (and I mean that in a good way). When the time comes for her to be respectful and take her medicine though, she's always a good girl about that. That's coming from someone who knows her personally.
"Roger" doesn't deserve any sort of explanation... that went out the window when he started babbling about 'you aren't cute' (and he has the nerve to talk about "proper social etiquette"... lol!). I offer my insights here for others.
As for the thing with Paul... I can only say I hope that does work out. Kelley is a cool chick and a good person... and Paul is as kind and generous as they come and also a good person.
~Todd (and Suzy)
americanspankingsociety.com
This too shall pass. It will be painful for awhile but you have too much going for you and too many people who like and love you for the pain to be permanent. For every man who breaks a woman's self esteem there is another man who yearns to whisper his expressions of love into her ear; for every many who pushes his woman away there is another man whose heart aches at the prospect of holding her in his arms.
ReplyDeleteThe pain will pass in about two weeks time.
Kelley,
ReplyDeleteI'm normally quiet and discreet on the internet. Rarely do I comment on any blog, message board, story site, or make a scene whatsoever. After reading your blog today, I felt compelled to at least give you my two cents (perhaps it's only worth about that much).
I've been following your blog quietly for a couple of years. Every time you post some of your thoughts, your writings, your delightful pictures, and a few exciting videos, I've watched and listened avidly. When I flick on my computer, your blog is almost always the first website I peek at with anticipation.
That being said, you have asked us in this heartfelt entry full of woe and self doubt not to comment on that infernal creep Roger's comment. I will (sort of) comply.
I wouldn't dare say that while I can usually suppress and contain my simmering hatred for such pond scum as the intolerant, obnoxious, or attention whores of the internet community, I find myself finally venting that pent up rage in a sudden maelstrom just for you. And you get to experience wrath that rarely gets released in the many years of this man. You should feel honored to be the victim of my ire. This release, however, doesn’t feel as swell as the more desirable releases.
My mother taught me that when I have something exclusively uncomplimentary to say, I should bite my lip most of the time. I'll enact a rare exception for Roger, you fricken idiot.
I have had other experiences in the past with the internet on chat sites and such places. My aversions in participating in such sites ebbed and flowed over time; waning when “trolls” such as you decided to grace the presence of an otherwise compelling, intelligent, and interesting array of personalities. Those same aversions waned as those same trolls disappeared with the cooperation of the dutiful moderators of a site or the culminating boredom of those same trolls when they were shunned or jilted by a membership.
(continued)
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete(continued and finally edited correctly ;)
ReplyDeleteWhich adjectives could be used to describe Roger? Indeed, I could be “loquacious” and “verbose” in my vivid uses of metaphors to paint a portrait of Roger and the nefarious company that he keeps. But I won’t. You are a condescending, short sighted, egotistical, impetuous, disrespectful, and foolish creep that craves attention garnered from irritating, agitating, and inciting the masses surrounding you with the unconventional and unwelcome words strung together carelessly with the clandestine purpose to attract attention to a false image of yourself, clouded with the anonymity of the internet, which in reality is a far cry from your own personal character. You’re likely a youngish, painfully lonely, self doubting man with an abundant need for a perpetual supply of prozak from your local pharmacist.
Roger - Kelley is a beautiful woman that many people follow on her blog out of sheer curiosity. I, for one, will do so for years to come if she continues to grace us with her presence. She is about to graduate from school, although it appears she needs some motivation to negotiate a few remaining hurdles, and embark on the rest of her likely fruitful life.
She is also one of the most tempting, beautiful, and eloquent women in the spanking community in my humble opinion.
That being said, she also has some issues with her own self image. She is FAR too hard on herself and doesn't realize just how many men and women dote over her from afar. She has also been through some very serious problems with an eating disorders in the past, from what I've read, so it's highly irresponsible for anyone with an ounce of compassion in their hearts to tickle the roots of that problem again. Shame on you.
Roger - grow the fuck up. You are such a waste of skin.
But that is just what I would say IF I was going to comment at all ;)
Teek
I'd just like to weigh in here with a "Roger, you slimy little piece of shit." You criticizing anyone for poor manners would be laughable, if you weren't doing your best to try to crush a girl's feelings in the process. You're not a man, much less a "dominant" one.
ReplyDeleteI've never met you, Princess Kelley, except through your blog. You're beautiful, smart, and adorable. You have a wonderful sense of humor that, apparently, a certain idiot misinterpreted, and then ran off his mouth because he has no discipline to control his pea brain.
Big hugs to you, Princess.
Eric
Roger,
ReplyDeleteAlthough you said you will not look again at Kelly's blog I tend to think you'll be back if for no other reason than your ego will not let go and you want to know what people are saying about you and to you. You are hoping for a groundswell of support and postings of people who have a similar opinion as you. Of course you are entitled to your opinion, but you realize now that you are in the minority. Of course you are entitled to your opinion but it is bad karma to kick someone while they are down which is exactly what your did here. And I hope you will remember that when "what goes around comes around" for you. When it does you'll be thinking "this isn't fair" which is exactly what Kelly is thinking; and you'll be thinking "I don't deserve this" but you do and you just set yourself up.
Kelly takes a great risk by posting intimate photos and opening up her thoughts, life, and heart for those who are interested. Why she does it is personal to her. Why others read and view it is personal to them. They may feel like a naughty voyeur, they may find it titillating, captivating, interesting, intriguing, etc. but they return because they like it and want to see what comes next.
There are also those that find her blog simply not to be their cup of tea. The mature, sensitive, and intelligent ones just don't come back. The immature, insensitive, self righteous, and those of low intellect, like you choose to become online hecklers to the benefit of no one.
Lastly, the name of the blog is "The Confessions of a Spanked Princess" not "The Confessions of a Spanked Princess and the rude commentary of an asshole named Roger".
And now I think you should run upstairs from the basement and tell your mother what you've been up to.
Sorry to hear about all your problems Kelley, have a great blow out after you have done all your work do things you never thought you would do show things you never thought you would show because in the years to come they will be the moments you laugh about (and if you get pictures post them here ;0).
ReplyDeleteDon't dwell on a broken heart it hurts so bad to start and then someone will come along and sweep you off your feet.
Hope you feel better soon
FD
Oh and ignore Roger everyone is entitled to their opinion but everyone else is entitled to ignore it
You're gonna be okay, princess... and it's a testament to how much people care about your site that you've gotten such an outpouring of concern from people many of whom have never met you.
ReplyDeleteTake some time with your college friends. Enjoy your graduation, as you deserve. Other things can come later.