Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Where is everyoneeeeeeeeeee?????
Sunday, December 26, 2010
so if you don't understand the meaning of the subject of this post you immediately need to Google vlog brothers on YouTube and watch as many of their videos as humanly possible. I would suggest 50 jokes in 4 minutes and their French revolution videos as well as adult female song.
Oh and just dftba!
So all of that is to explain an idea i had recently.
The vlog brothers are two brothers who im 2007 decided to stop all textual communication and instead decided to communicate through videos on YouTube. This immediately became amazing. Those of us who follow them are called nerd fighters and our goal is to eliminate world suck.
So if you haven't noticed, i have kinda been doing a shitty job of updating. That's not to say though that i don't think about the blog or just things i think and them immediately wish i could share all the Damn time!
So these guys dedication has really made me look at mine. What if during the day, whenever i thought of something to tell you i just wrote it down or recorded it on my phone? And at the end of the day i just posted this list of sorts. That would mean you would get a lot of random bullet points some of which might not make any sense at all, but then i could burn use these lists to help me remember what i wanted to say im my longer posts.
Well im going to give it a bit of a try on my way home with some audio- i really am really good at talking lol! ;-)
Sent from Yahoo! Mail on Android
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Im so sorry that i have been so absent as of late. As i an sure you can imagine, finals were a bit crazy. I can't even believe the semester is over still! In the end i actually had my best semester gpa wise ever.
I an actually excited to write about a bunch of stuff that has been happening. Right now im writing this on my phone while watching the game with my family.
I just want to say merry Christmas to all of you and happy holidays in general. I an sure i will be writing before the new year but i want to say ahead of time how wonderful you all have been as always this year, even while i have not been the best of friends or blogger this year.
Merry Christmas everyone. I promise to post again tomorrow.
Sent from Yahoo! Mail on Android
Monday, November 29, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
So i haven't put my photos from Halloween on my computer yet but i realized i could email this one from my phone to my blog. Pretty sweet!
Anyway, this is night one, and my first Halloween of age, and thus in a bar. Uh oh. Kelley in a bar? Recipe for naughtiness!
And this photo inspired my response and thus quote of the night
'Oh you look hot! are you britney spears?'
Sent from Yahoo! Mail on Android
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
So I first saw this in a blog article linked from Yahoo questioning bullshit about if the cover currently on GQ or this one was too risqué for the show or the actors. Whatever. Like I said, bullshit.
I'm just wondering though, if the first time you saw the Glee picture the first thing that popped in your head was this oh so wonderful and just classic National Lampoon cover?
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Saturday, November 13, 2010
- So Yahoo decided to spam half of ya'lls comments on my last post. Stupid yahoo. I live for comments. They make me feel so special. And had I gotten them I might have been encouraged to do this sooner (unlikely, but possible)
- Yahoo did NOT spam the 3 from "phonesex." seriously yahoo? Seriously?
- I am a pharmaceutical company's wet dream.
- about a month ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression. This is in addition to my generalized anxiety disorder with panic attacks. It was bad, but not bad like I know many people who suffer with depression do. Mostly probably as a result of the fact that I was already on meds for the anxiety.
- I am also in the middle of an identity/existential crisis.
- This is probably the biggest reason I haven't been on here much, or responding to emails. I just haven't done anything.
- If you have emailed me, and I haven't responded to you, I PROMISE I am not ignoring you. In fact, your email might have been the only thing that made me smile, or think of this world that day. I read them. I love them. I am a failure as a southerner for not responding. Bc ya'll deserve a response. Thank you for being the greatest friends/fans ever. :)
- Glee is the best show on television
- Ok. False. Welllll. Glee is the best show on television, BUT, Supernatural (which is still on tv, but I'm not loving this season) is in the running for best show of all time (currently about to overtake Buffy as my favorite ever. Joss Whedon still rules all though).
- Glee=singing= Rachel =love=spanking- a post will follow about this i PROMISE.
- I literally spent 27 hours the other weekend reading Supernatural spanking fanfiction. Some wincest (don't judge, wincest is just slash but better), some not. But yes, 27 hours. This is only slightly abnormal for me.
- However, there were also fanvids involved. this is abnormal. They have nothing to do with spanking.
- I also intend to attend a Supernatural convention. Not joking. I am that person.
- If you didn't understand half of the terminology involved in this section, don't worry. You're normal. (But I must say, so not cool *wink*)
- Speaking of conventions, no I was not able to attend the Shadow Lane party. Mainly because hosting a "Back to School" party generally means that those going back to school are, hey, what a concept, back at school.
- Also, given what happened in London this summer, I don't think I will be attending a party unless I am "known" or have a date.
- Also speaking of Shadow Lane, just rented the new Keith Jones movie, "Smarty Pants." Great film! Love the new girl, she is very pretty. Kinda reminds me of me when I was thinner. Definitely brats like I do. Hey, sometimes the answer to, "are you going to behave?" is simply "No."
- Also rented for the first time Cold Comfort Farm. Damn. I know that the spanking is pretty weak, which is probably why some people who haven't watched a shadow lane video since the 80s might think that they're all like that, but I didn't care- those girls were hot. SOOO dated, but still hot. And Keith before he turned grey! OMG! Its like when I saw Mark Harmon (Gibbs) was the Sexiest Man Alive in 85 and was young and I was like, wtf?
- ....wow that bullet had too many teenager isms
- Rachel Maddow rules my world :)
- I have no desire to figure out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life, or for that matter what I plan to do after I graduate! I'm thinking Europe.
- I like wine. A lot. But alcohol in too large a quantity is baddddddddd (re: don't do shots of Baileys and vodka)
- I got an Android. Love it. :)
- My roommate is the hottest thing that God ever created. I kinda forgot this when I asked to room with her. It can be a bit distracting....
- She needs a spanking SOOOO badly
- She's Super vanilla. :(
- I am a massive creeper.
- There is a photo on here of her ass from a year ago....I've taken more since.
- Yes she knows I'm bi, but she just likes it because I give her good attention that her long distance stupid boyfriend doesn't give her. And because I can tell her what lingerie looks hottest. And she knows I know these things :)
- We have a mouse in our room. We named him JJ. Jerry Jr. Bc I had a mouse last year that I named Jerry (Tom and Jerry), so this one is JJ.
- We may have named him, but we REALLY want him to go far far away.
- One of my seminar professors is letting me write my research paper on the history of the sprawled out female nude. Not joking. So fucking excited.
- And speaking of the word Fuck. Two best songs I'm listening to right now that aren't from Glee or directly Top 40
- Fuck You by Cee Lo Green. Watch this video. Not only is the song awesome but the video is just....omg.
- Black and Blue by Zach Chance, I have no idea what this video is- just listen to the song
- Halloween, oh Halloween. I'm sorry ya'll didn't get your annual post, but you will get pictures.
- Day One. Naughty Catholic School Girl.
- "Oh! You look so hot! Are you Britney Spears?"
- "Thanks! No, actually, I'm a fetish."
- Day Two: Vampire. I don't think my boobs have ever been that out there.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
All very me. And a pretty well rounded representation I might add. Here's two more to go with it. One old one that shows me laughing and being a goofball- something I do a lot, but you don't get to see as much, and one more from Colorado, just because I'm obsessed with the photos of this sunset I took after this (soon I'll give ya'll a post of just my art photos).
Saturday, August 21, 2010
In Brugge :) Belgian waffel with icecream, whipped cream, and fudge sauce. I was sick for two days :). But I cleaned my plate ;)
So, most of these are all of me getting ready to go to my "Belated 21st B-day Dinner" with my godparents. I got this FABULOUS dress in Rome, and am absolutely in love with it. It makes me feel so sexy. So I knew that I wasn't going to wear red lips (or my hair with the big feather from London in it) but I just had to see what it looked like. The last picture is how I ended up in the end, lol. Much more "appropriate" for a nice dinner on the town with your high society relatives, lol. :)
"My Christina Hendricks Moment"
(Joan from "Mad Men" (or Saffron from Firefly))
Note: this is the same evening, but a different bra and skirt that was just in my closet. It was inspired by the panties I was wearing....I know, that's ironic given that you can't see them. Sorry :(
Sorry for the long absence. Its been a pretty rough month for me.
I got back to the states on August 2nd, and lets just say I have had the easiest of times readjusting to American life- or living at my parents house before my senior year starts up and I go back to school.
I've basically been feeling trapped to be honest. I went from being able to get to Paris in an hour and a half if I wanted to whenever I wanted to, to not being able to go to Walgreens if my Mom's car wasn't home (they sold my car when I left for college since I can't have it at my school- no where to park, or need really- but in Texas, there is ALWAYS a need for a car). Then there is the fact that my mother and I do not get along the vast majority of the time. I went from living on my own to having someone knock on my door for whatever reason and the second they walk in they want to know "what am I doing on the computer? Have you worked on your Fulbright application? are you going to unpack those boxes? why is your closet light on?" Its wonderful too when those things get asked of me 10 minutes after I've woken up, when I've been in a country for less than a week. Now its feeling more like just the old annoyance (times 10) that its always been to be here, but back when I first got back, I really felt like someone had ripped me from a life I was perfectly happy with and stuck me in one and trapped me there.
In the middle, for some reason my parents decided that we should take a family trip to this club we belong to in Colorado. Now, I haven't been to colorado since I was 5, so it was surprisingly beautiful and fun. Lots of outdoor activities, I wasn't forced to be with them all the time, and when I was the weather and the view made it worth while. I'll post some pictures.
But now I'm back. I leave for school on Friday. I'm very sad to leave my friends here though- Michael (who is doing SO much better, but still totally imobile basically) isn't going back to his campus this year, and I'm sad I'm not going to get to visit him there. Really and truly, my friends are the reason I like being here at all, but this time its been extra difficult with the having to be back in the US (God I miss Italian food if nothing else) and trying to prepare for my senior year, and then the rest of my life (which everyone seems to want me to have figured out). Oh, familial expectations, how I have not missed you.
OK, I'm done ranting, and I'm going to give you some good posts I promise. I've honestly been doing that thing where you put something off for so long that then you want to put it off more and more. Yaaaaaaa, sorry bout that ya'll. :( (feel free to spank away- I really could use one)
In fun, what to expect soon news, I told my last best friend from home, Brittany, about spanking and she took it really well :)- that story coming soon. Then she and I went panty shopping! WOOHOOO, so I have 20 new pairs of panties to show you. Please feel encouraged to voice your opinions about how you would like to see them ;). Sadly for ya'll, she has vehemntly refused to allow a few fabulous photos of her wonderful dancers butt in a cute teddy she got for her new boyfriend to be put on this website, but I'll give you a nice description later, lol. :)
Also to come posts on: spanking industry stuff I'm newly in love with, My limits, British playdates, The need for a Code Word, "good girl," Bordello, and my different states of pouting. Please tell me in the comments which ones you would be interested in hearing about, and I will write those first :).
Love ya'll, as always, and I have missed you! I need to remember that I can always seek safety here. :)
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
David decided that this would be a fun undertaking on Sunday. :) It was entertaining, albeit painful :) Hope you like the results. If only I could have done this a year or so ago for Todd and Suzy's contest!
PS. For the record, these are WAY higher on my bottom than is typically allowed. Going too close to my lower back (/top of my bottom) is a big no-no limit with me. But I allowed it for the sake of the art ;) And because it was only 4 ridiculoulsy hard smacks, so I didn't really have time to complain, and after the first 2 he couldn't change where he'd put them! lol :)
So thank you to everyone who has kept Michael in their thoughts and prayers, I can't tell you how much your support has meant to me. As of right now, Michael is back home with his family. Well actually he's in a hospital at home, but atleast he's not in Italy anymore. They are saying he's going to be released into an out patient rehab program next week, and hope that he should be able to go back to school (not functioning fully by any means) but that he can Go (he goes to school in the northeast) on time. His leg is supposed to heal in about 6 to 7 months, and his brain...well we're hoping for the best.
Let me tell you a bit about what happened and my time there. (I'm sorry if this is too much or just really off topic to some people, but its on my mind a lot lately, so bear with me)
Michael was on a school trip in Capri when he was hit by a young boy on a Vespa. Michael flew 15 ft in the air and over 2 trees before crashing down on the sidewalk (Michaels very nice camera was later found 50 ft away in a garden). As you can imagine, its a miracle he is alive. The boy by the way, also crashed, but was thankfully wearing a helmet and is ok. What happened after is really all a bunch of just...luck...that we still have him with us here. Someone near by heard the crash and called the police before even looking to see what happened. Some police were near by and able to come quickly. Upon seeing the situation, the cop called for the helicopter to be readied, as he knew they would not be able to handle the situation on Capri itself. Michael at this time was awake and talking, cracking jokes like normal, the bone was just sticking out of his leg. Thank god one of the EMT's happened to ask if anything other than his leg hurt and he said (thank god he speaks italian) that his head kinda hurt. He was in surgery within the hour. There was bleeding on the inside of his skull but it hadn't reached his brain yet, which is why he is...well not a vegetable or dead. Minutes...minutes....and my best friend could be lying 6 ft under...
I flew down to Naples for the weekend two weekends ago and made it to the hospital where his parents and Michael were. The hospital was a massive city like complex that reminded me a lot of Cuba to be honest, but the treatment there was wonderful (if not as attentive as American care.) They saved Michael's life. I won't go into what happened in the neuro ward when I wasn't there, but just imagine a distraught mother who speaks no Italian trying to get information about her comatose son.
Anyway, so the first day I was there, he was pretty good. The scar on his head is ridiculous, and his leg was still in a cast. He's thin, and he was just...pretty helpless. But he could kinda talk to me. He would mumble a lot and he lost energy very quickly, but he can still understand Italian and we talked about Carravaggio. :) I ran around trying to get as much information from the nurses (men though, I'm not sure what they would be called, but I think they're nurses) as I could. There were no doctors-- for what reasons I'm still unsure of, other than the "its sunday, and its italy" reason. I also talked to all the familys on the floor. He was in an ortho ward, so one of the boys there had had the surgery Michael was going to have (Michaels was the only one who had also been in the neuro/ICU ward). Michaels parents didn't realize how well I spoke, and were very grateful in the end. I just did what I could. I was a good "squeaky wheel" as my mother would say. :)
The second day was rougher. I had downloaded a movie on my computer (he didn't have Any of his stuff with him, and I figured he was bored out of his mind) for us to watch (Invictus) but he was never really with it, and too tired to watch. He wasn't really talking or making sense, and his eyes were hurt by the light. He slept basically the entire day, and was extremely NOT lucid when he was awake. It was really rough for me to see. My best friend sitting there but just not really there. Also one of his eyes doesn't really open fully. That apperently is still one of the biggest problems, and the doctors are just saying his eyes (now with double vision sometimes) will heal with time.
His mood apparently is much better than it was. He had been waiting over a week for his leg surgery. He got it the day after I left. I made sure of it, lol. He kept waking up and thinking it was Monday and would get so depressed when we told him it was still Sunday. I finally was like, if you wake up, and I'm not here, its time for your surgery. I was devestated I had to leave. Even just sitting there, and going to the little mini market in the bacement of one of the buildings in the hospital to help them get groceries felt to me like I was helping in some way, and that he knew I was with him, even when he was asleep. His parents, by the way, were handling the whole Italy thing so well. They were making everything into a positive- it was really inspiring.
Since then, they managed to fly him home (with a doctor on board) and he is in the hospital at home. My mom went to visit him for a bit the other day and said he was doing well. I think that the moral victory of having his leg set (even if it means there is effectively a 3 hole punch looking metal thing on the side of his calf for the next 6 months) and moving forward was a lot for him and his progress. Plus they just say, his brain is fine, we just have to let it heal and wake at its own speed.
Ok, that's it. Thank you for listening, and thank you for your support. I love you all, and am about to follow this up with a much more light-hearted post to cheer everyone up. And remember, Michael is in good spirits they say, so we can be too! :)
Monday, July 19, 2010
I am alive.
A really shitty friend and blogger, but alive.
I am so sorry for my long absence, and I'm even sorrier to those of you who have been worried about me. All is well, I have just been kinda out of it the last couple of weeks. And not just from ya'll. Literally, my friends and family hadn't heard from me either. I'm so sorry.
But I have a list a mile long of things to tell you about, and as I'm writing this it's starting to feel better...I just needed to make myself do it.
I think part of me was scared to write. This place lost something for me in all the drama that happened, but that's behind me now, and its time for Kelley to get her grove back!
And to start things off, everyone say thank you to my new boy David, for the wonderful photos (and possibly video) coming soon :). I'll be telling you more about him soon (though not everything sadly, as he is a reader on here) as well as an update on Michael and on just life in general, and more spanking fun, very very soon. I promise!
Love you!! More to come soon :)
Saturday, July 3, 2010
"What do you want?"
"What do you do?"
"Everything. But I don't kiss on the mouth"
"Neither do I."
So right now I'm on a flight to Naples to go visit Michael and his parents at the hospital for the weekend. They are going to try to move him to Rome today, so I might end up on a train right after I land, but Rome will be a much better place than Naples I think. And his program is in Rome so hopefully that would mean more of his friends would be able to visit him. His mom says he's getting a bit discouraged at the slow progress and feeling lonely I'm sure. He is making progress but it's very slow. He's still not totally with us yet, but I know in my heart that he will get better. He has to get better.
But, on a better note, I have great news. I have been kissed. Kissed? You ask. Yes kissed. Well spanked and held and felt up too, lol, but for the purposes of right now, I have been kissed.
Last night I met a wonderful young man named David, and I impulsively invited him over to my apartment after only talking with him for about 48 hours. It just seemed like it would work, and it is very American to have friends over to your apartment just to hang out. So I'd spoken to him on the phone and seen pictures and I just felt safe that I could have him over. My turf- also a first for me, and SOO wonderful. (Of course Momma had a minor fit that my "turf" looked like a war zone, so I had to clean before company could come over).
Anywho, so he came over, and we just chatted for about an hour- I was feeling him out, getting comfortable. We really didn't talk about spanking much at all. It was pretty much all vanilla- which was actually really nice. This entire thing has re-encouraged me. After what has happened lately, I was just wanting out of London- wanting to go home, and honestly a bit scared to meet anyone else. But this was something I knew how to do. I can meet single men and I know how to play with them and how to keep myself safe.
Fortunately, David and I got along really well- he's funny and sweet and caring and he treats me really well- and so we progressed to playing.
Then things got interesting.
I am going to tell you about all the interesting things (including but not limited to water bottles, extreme bratting, wet bottom spankings, punishment spankings, semi public spankings and semi public exposure), but right now what I want to talk about is kissing.
I actually was thinking about writing a post on this before he came, and after he came, now my post has changed drastically.
Everyone knows the line from Pretty Woman, it's a classic. But it's something I've come to notice about myself over the last couple of years. I remember when I was 15 and this girl that I started eating lunch with who was new to the school and a bit more rebellious than I was, shocked me when she said that she had had sex with a guy the night before and afterwards realized that she never kissed him. Now remember that even though I've been looking at porn since I was 10, I never wanted sex- I wanted to be spanked. So the fact that she had sex was shocking in itself (most all of my friends never had) but that she hadn't kissed him to me made her seem like…well like Vivian in the movie.
I have since changed my mind.
Kissing for me is the most intimate act of all. The one that stands above the rest as the make or break moment for me in knowing if I want someone as a romantic interest. And I often just don't kiss, because for me, a kiss that isn't right- not necessarily a Bad kiss, just one that doesn't feel right- is the fastest thing in the world to pull me out of a situation and leave me a willing spectator instead of participant to a sexual situation.
Yes, I've made out with guys at parties, and in Florence in April I made out with a guy I was barely attracted to in a club just because I was feeling tired of being so inactive. It was worthless. Its like just going through the motions. Eyes opened, head thinking about what I'm having for breakfast the next morning. Until yesterday it had been over a year since I was last kissed in a way that felt right. Since my ex (well when I met up with Jonathon last July we kissed he assures me, but that was such a different time for me, as I was recovering from my breakup then still) I have played a couple times and been spanked by a couple different people (though as you all know it had been about a year for that too), but not kissed.
When I was playing with Abel and Haron, we'd been playing for like 2 hours and I had been naked and orgasmed a few times already when he tried to kiss me. He was holding me and rubbing me and everything just felt so perfect, but the second he tried to kiss me, I knew it was wrong (the kiss was good, but my heart wasn't there). Sometimes, if I don't care that much, I will just let the kiss happen, even if I'm not feeling it, but that time, I stopped it. In part because I desperately didn't want to be pulled out of my heaven that I was in, and also because I was uncomfortable about the fact that his wife was at that moment suckling my breast. As I told him when I pulled away "you're wife is right there!" Her fabulous response "You don't hear me complaining do you?" Lol. I then kissed her (my first girl/girl kiss!!!)
About a month ago, I stupidly tired texted my ex (it's like driving. You know how they say that tired driving is as bad as drunk driving? Tired texting is as bad as drunk texting.) saying "I miss kissing you." Because at that moment, I did. I still do sometimes. It was the one thing about our relationship that always worked, and never felt wrong. Even spanking sometimes got complicated and dark, but kissing- kissing him was the best part. Feeling like I was his. Feeling his love. And even as I grow and fall in love again and again, his kiss will always be his kiss. Other people will kiss well or better and they will have their own place in my heart. But his kiss for me has always epitomized what I miss about him and my relationship with him. I can get sex- I just have to ask some guy in a bar. I can get a spanking fairly easily if I just ask the right places. But getting a kiss that feels right, getting a kiss that is right in my soul, that is much harder to find.
I can have an extremely deep connection with someone, and want to be fucked and felt and spanked by them, and want them in my life desperately (cough Abel and Haron cough) but kissing still wouldn't be something I'd want to do. It is unrelated to spanking, and really unrelated to sex. Certainly unrelated to friendship. Cuddling and spanking and orgasming and cuddling will make me feel safer and closer and more loved in those situations than kissing will. Kissing is romance….kissing is just different.
And last night I got kissed. It took me about 3 hours of him being there and 2 of us playing with me naked and him giving me all over body kisses before I let go and gave in. I was worried it wouldn't be there, and that it would pull me out of the place that I had to fight to get in yesterday (will explain that later). But it didn't. It felt good and it felt right and I just let myself relax into it. I let myself feel it. I let myself be. It was a wonderful kiss too. Not aggressive (no tongue until after a few minutes), just gentle and caring. Later he kissed me against a wall and I lost my breath. I forgot where I was. …
I don't think that David and I are going to become bf/gf or anything if for no other reason than I am going home in 4 weeks, but I am just feeling so happy. I feel back to normal, and I feel cared for and special. I feel beautiful. I feel important. And I feel well spanked and well kissed as I sit on this plane. J
Sunday, June 27, 2010
I don’t what prompted this, but one time I stuck my tongue out at Abel, a little bratty trick that I am very fond of- its cute and endearing, and not harmful in any way or dangerous to property, lol- and he gave me the look. Mmmmmmm. Miss Haron laughed and said “Uh oh, you’re on thin ice.” I smirked, feeling extra bratty and immediately did it again, “getting thinner” they both replied. Not exactly sure what possessed me at this next moment (actually yes I am, I wanted the ice to crack and I didn’t want there to be any doubt about it!) but I proceeded to flip him off while smirking. “Crack” Miss Haron replied while trying to contain laughter. Abel just kept giving me that amazing top look and said “We will discuss that when we get home young lady” or something to that extent.
Home couldn’t come soon enough. They have a lovely home, and as soon as I got there, Abel led me upstairs so I could skype my momma so she’d see him and know I was safe. Then Miss Haron needed to Skype her real life mom, and Abel and I went downstairs (oh btw, they have the sweetest and cutest kitty cat!!!). He was sitting on the couch, and I immediately spotted this little plastic water gun on the table. Apparently it’s for the cat. Yeah right. I say it’s there specifically to entice brats like me into trouble! I pick it up without hesitation, and the “No, young lady, put it down-s” begin. It actually took a long time to squirt, and he kept telling me no the whole time, but when it finally did, you would have thought I wasn’t pumping it with the shocked look on my face as water shot out across at Abel.
He rose from the couch and I just didn’t move. I immediately put down the gun as though it had burned me, but other than that, I didn’t move. He came around and said something along the lines of “that’s it young lady” and took me by the arm and led me upstairs. On the way up he asked Miss Haron where she was, and was about to ask her to move downstairs, but she was in an ok room I supposed- didn’t really get that- I just know that his tone was really sexy. He brought me into their bedroom and stood right in front of me, giving me the sternest look. Now, without my shoes (which I had left downstairs upon entering their home) Abel is taller than me, but not by a whole lot, but his lecture and his look made me feel very small indeed. I know that they aren’t DD people in the way that I am, but he would be really good at it! Lol.
(Oh, apparently I said something during this lecture that almost made him laugh out loud at my brattiness, and he told me later he had to work really hard to maintain his composure, but I can’t for the life of me remember what I said)
He sat on the edge of the bed, and told me to take my “trousers” down, but my panties for now, stayed up. He placed me across his knee and…well I’m not going to lie to ya’ll, I know that some awesome things were said at this point, but it is all just a blur. And I’m sure especially for you long term readers that you know my favorite type of spanking is hand otk, and this did not disappoint. Abel’s hand HURTS. This time though he did give me a warm up, but over the course of a year without any spankings not delivered by my own hands, I had forgotten just how much it stings!! Such a wonderful wonderful sting. I was squirming quite quickly and yelping as the swats rained down on my bottom. Oh, and he did such a good job lecturing too. He told me that had it just been for my naughty behavior on the train I might have gotten to keep my panties up (he might have said knickers, lol) but that my behavior with the water gun meant I had to get a bare bottom spanking. THANK GOD! Lol.
And ya’ll know how I love that feeling of them being pulled down. It’s one of my favorite parts of the whole spanking. Sigh. But then he went to town. My oh my. I was about sobbing after 10 of his hard swats, yelping and writhing for sure. Then he stopped and rubbed my bottom, and reached over to the night stand, picking up a hairbrush. I whined pititully. He said “that was for punishment, this is for discipline, you know the difference right young lady?” “yes sir” I replied like a good girl. Sigh, I love saying sir. :) he spanked me with the brush for a bit, and then let me up, he had me pull my pants and panties up and then held me close as I finished sobbing- no tears, and the sobs didn’t last long (neither did the spanking) but it’d just been so long- and it felt so good. Then he asked the silly question of if he hurt me and if I was ok. Lol, I said of course I’m fine :) That was wonderful! And gave my always response of “Thank you for spanking me sir” with a tight hug.
He chuckled and just seemed so pleased with everything- as was I. He later told me that this was one of his favorite parts of the whole evening. And it was quite wonderful.
So we got up and started mulling around and I found the HUGE stash of implements. HUGE. Mondo big. Way too many implements for anyone’s own good. Lol. And all very British. We were just looking around and chatting when Miss Haron walked in.
“Well those were some interesting noises to explain to my mother.”
And now the real fun (aka crazy shit) begins….
I don’t promise I can remember it all as I was in a well spanked stupor for most of it, so let’s just hope that Miss Haron will forgive me and one of them will write their side of the story (as I would love to read it sooo much as well).
Where to begin? I suppose the beginning would be best. The lovely Miss Bonnie mentioned Abel as a good resource in the UK, and when he emailed me two weeks ago, I thought, sure, this sounds like a good opportunity, especially since these people are already vouched for. We only actually like exchanged a few emails before we met, lol, which we both have acknowledged was kinda ridiculous. But in the end it didn’t matter.
They had me meet them at Piccadilly Circus at 1:00 on Saturday and we were just scheduled to get lunch. Ya’ll saw the post about that, lol. For the record I ended up wearing my tight jeans (b/c it was cold) and a sexy top with black wedges (which resulted in my towering over the very petite Miss Haron, lol). The connection, on my end, was instant. It didn’t feel like I was meeting new people, it felt more like I was getting together with old friends.
They took me to a lovely Belgian restaurant that was “just a few minutes away” as Abel said. Liar. Lol. It was very fun though, as well as yummy and the conversation was easy and free. It was different than some of my other spanko meetings. Well for starters I’d never met a spanko girl before, so that was a first, nor had I ever met more than one person at a time, or a couple. So lots of firsts, as I mentioned before. But also, I am one of those people who can tell within about 15 minutes of meeting someone if it’s going to work out- especially with spankos, and I’m quite impulsive/decisive with the way I feel. I’ve been on dates with guys who right after the meal I said my goodbyes and headed home, never to see them again, because I knew it wasn’t right. I’ve also met guys, been kinda turned on the entire time I was with them, and then go back to their place right after.
With Abel and Haron, I knew that I wanted to play, and I wasn’t sure if they were game, but the new part was that the whole time I wasn’t feeling horny, I was just feeling comfortable. Well on occasion when Miss Haron would act up a bit and he would give her “the look” my tummy would do a bit of a dance, but there was no overt flirting on either side.
As I said, they were not exactly keen to play on the first meeting. Miss Haron said it wasn’t very responsible or adult like. I quickly pointed out that I’m 21 years old, and can easily blame my irresponsible behavior on my age. Abel returned from the restroom and I whined in my sweetest voice that I wanted to play and was so disappointed that we couldn’t (because they live outside of London). He, after a bit more whining and hinting from me, said well why don’t you come back home with us?
I immediately text begged Momma and Daddy to let me go, and they said yes after reminding me of “the rules.”
But before we went, we decided to wander around London a bit, and they showed me some really awesome sex shops! Lol, I was in heaven. We went to this one that was just gorgeous. Implements that were actually decent, and just stunning toys- that of course were way out of everyone’s price range, but just so fun to look at. One of those places that makes you feel really good about liking sexy things. They even had jade butt plugs- which I am very intrigued by (I like the metal ones with the stones on the end but I am allergic to metal, so I think the jade might be a nice alternate).
Anywho, then we went to another store that was more practical, and Miss Haron bought some toys for her new boy-toy and I had fun just looking around (I’m in the market for a new vibrator). Then we headed towards the train…
So the drama is passing and subsiding from my being a little more every day. Abel has forgiven me, but Miss Haron has not, and that fact is weighing very heavily on my heart. Hopefully as time passes, and I can show her that I really am a good girl, she will forgive me, and give me another chance.
But in the meantime, I will be posting the story of our day together today- I'm ready :). But I was in a haze half the time, so if you want to know the other side of the story, and you happen to be readers of their blog, you should ask them very nicely to tell their side- though, since she's pissed at me, I don't think that's going to happen. :( Sorry team.
But for now, we are doing fun posts that reclaim my blog as MINE. Away from the hate mail senders and threats of violence. This place is mine and it is a place for fun. So for the moment, that is what we are going to have- fun. :)
So I wrote this list on a train in Italy I have no idea how long ago. I believe it was inspired by a post by the ever wonderful Bonnie who did a similar list. So these are the songs, in no particular order, that make me think of spanking, and why.
- Criminal- Fiona Apple: "I've been a bad bad girl" No song has ever had a better first line.
- Nasty Naughty Boy- Christina Aguilera: "Now come here and give me a little spanking" very few songs have ever been more explicit about it. My word I do love xxxtina. :)
- Smack That- Akon ft. Eminem- first of all, its a great song, second, I realize its about sex, but whenever I hear it...its not. ;)
- All 'Er Nothin- Oklahoma the Musical: So I saw Oklahoma! on Broadway when I was 13 and I almost died from arousal. First of all the man playing Curly is the actor who would go on to play Raul in The Phantom of the Opera Movie- yeah, that guy- singing Oh What a Beautiful Morning...swoon! Ok, and there is a spoon wacking in the beginning, and then Curly threatens to spank his love out right towards the end! But I just love this song- the too flirty girl and her steadfast, traditional fiance. In the 1800s in OK, oh yeah, she's getting her backside warmed later :)
- Heartbreaker remix- Mariah Carey: So this is more about the video than the song. There are two remixes to this song one featuring JayZ, the other featuring Missy elliot and dBrat. The first is the video to which I refer which came out when I was like...12. Mariah and a bunch of back up dancers just smack their backsides during a dance sequence in a movie theatre...but I used to watch it over and over and over, lol. And then the second remix, don't like the video as much but the song has the line "I like the way he used to spank me."
- Baby Got Back- Sir Mix A Lot- Does this one really need explaining?
- How Many Licks- Lil' Kim- So I used to test people's level of composure by playing the unedited version of this song to them and seeing how long they could last before they would die from blushing. It just makes me think of naughty naughty things. You MUST listen to this song if you have never heard it. Plus, I'm a huge tootsie pop fan- always have been :)
- Discovery Channel-Bloodhound Gang- ok maybe this list is turning into songs that just make me feel awesomly naughty :) lol. I can sing this entire song from memory from start to finish. So great for Karaoke! "Just like the lost catacombs of egypt only god knows where we stuck it..."
- Loubitons- Jennifer Lopez- in addition to being a song by the girl with one of the most famous backsides of all time, and being a really awesome female empowerment song, this song has lots of nice unintentional spanking esque lines. Now, Loubitons for all the boys out there, are these really awesome shoes. Like Minolo Blanik, or Feragamo, or Jimmy Choo. You get the point. But Loubitons are really in right now, and they are famous for having a crimson red undersides. :D "Watch these red bottoms, and the back of my jeans, as we go bye baby don't know what you got until its gone. Tail lights, is all you'll see. Watch that Benz exit that drive way, yeah"
- Sexy Back- Justin Timberlake- In the song the boy sings about being tied up and whipped, but in his VMA"s performance of the song, he changed the pronouns around and made it "Maybe I'll whip you if you misbehave" moannnnnnn. Yes please!
- Du Hast Den Schalstden Arse del Welt (You've Got the Sweetest Ass in the World)- in German or in English, just google the Youtube video. Thank you my best friends at school who spend way too much time on Youtube for this gem :)
So what do ya'll think of my list? What are the songs that make you think of spanking. Comments (when they are not hateful) make me Very happy :D
Friday, June 25, 2010
Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
His underwear is hanging on the lamp.
His raincoat is there in the overstuffed chair,
And the chair is becoming quite mucky and damp.
His workbook is wedged in the window,
His sweater's been thrown on the floor.
His scarf and one ski are beneath the TV,
And his pants have been carelessly hung on the door.
His books are all jammed in the closet,
His vest has been left in the hall.
A lizard named Ed is asleep in his bed,
And his smelly old sock has been stuck to the wall.
Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
Donald or Robert or Willie or--
Huh? You say it's mine? Oh, dear,
I knew it looked familiar!
PPSS. Or the middle of the summer After freshman year (this one is definitely the worst- first time without a roommate away from home- this is the view from sitting on my bed)
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Due to some shall we say...not nice.. emails I have gotten from some people, and just some that show me that I was not clear, I would like to clear up a couple points.
First of all, my meeting with Abel and Haron was amazing and while they are currently very upset with me, none of my comments that hurt people (which I realize many of you thankfully didn't read) were regarding them. No one deserved the statements I made hastily and regret saying, but they were not targetted at Abel and Haron, just as a point of clarification for those of you who are like wtf is going on? It was about a party I was invited to by friends of them, who were very nice people, it just wasn't a good situation for me. Mostly my fault.
In regards to my comment about "almost choked" I meant that in the surprised sense, not the gagging sense. I did not know going in, and finding out was surprising/shocking and in mid bite, it made for a rather amusing spectacle. The term was in ""s bc it was what he had said to me after, but not in a negative way. It is not a lifestyle I would want to participate actively in, and not one that I can view easily, but I respect everyones right to have their own lifestyles. I also reserve my right to have my own opinions- I am not trying to make anyone do something they do not wish to do, but I allowed to have my own thoughts.
Currently I have tried to make amends with the people that I hurt, and I have recieved forgiveness from some. I feel horrid about all of this- both that I hurt people and just that there is so much drama going on now in large part bc of me- and I'm not being dismissive in any way of the pain that my words and actions have caused other people. Hate mail is unneccessary.
My main concern and fear at this moment is that the people whose opinion I care most about and whos forgiveness I desperately seek- H and A- will not forgive me, and I will have lost people that I thought could have been great friends and I had a fast connection with.
I need to get back to work. I will update on Michael soon. And again, thank you to those of you who have been so kind to me and have been praying for him.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
This time this is for me and my team. :) This is my space, and I need it. I never realized how much I need it until I suddenly felt like it wasn't mine anymore. But I need ya'll and I need my space to be.
I can't breathe. I can't eat. Nothing has stayed down in days. Well it does, but just...i'm just so upset and everything just feels so wrong, and I just want to stop hurting!
And I just realized something. I am So homesick. I've been gone and sort of on my own for 6 months now, and I miss my friends and I miss my family and I miss my friends from school. I miss my life that I understand. I miss not having to meet new people every day. I think last night was so hard in part (well it was more spankos than I'd met in my life all in one room) bc it was so hard to not realize how lonely I have been, and then see so many friends and feel like an outsider.
So now I'm just crying, and trying to make myself go buy groceries. I'm trying to snuggle with my nana and papa like always, but its just different now. This is literally my frist time being Totally on my own. In florence I had my host family and people at school even if they weren't my friends. Then I was traveling so it was an adventure. Then my mom was here, then last week was hard but I was in another woman's house. Now I'm in an apartment all by myself which I've never done before and now all of this has happened.
I feel lost.
Like in a really existential way. I graduate next year- then what am I going to do? Where will I go? I will be by myself then too. What do I want as a spanko? Am I ready to be back in a relationship? Is the scene really for me? Should I just give up on parties and the scene life and just stick to one on one stuff with just regular people?
I want to write sooo badly about my play date with Abel and Haron in part because I'm terrified I'm forgetting it. I didn't even have a day to process before all of this drama started to unfold and my stomach started acting up. I want to write bc I think it will help me remember and cherish that amazing day. But I'm scared to write bc I'm scared it will hurt. I have humiliated them in a really epic way with the way I behaved recently. They vouched for me, and they did everything for me, and now it is they, not I, who have to deal with the fall out. So I'm scared to remember, I'm scared to write, b/c what if then I remember how amazing it was and how close I felt to them. I recall vividly the connection I felt, just so perfectly, to both of them. How their hands felt on my body. How there voices sounded. How perfect it felt to be snuggled between them.... what if I remember all those things and then they can't forgive me?
I forgot how much writing this all out can sometimes help.
No new news about Michael. I think I'm going this weekend but he's still not out of ICU so I wouldn't actually be able to spend more than 15 minutes with him if that- since I'm not blood family. Thank you to everyone who messaged with support. It has meant a lot to me, and thank you so much for the prayers- I know he and his family appreciate them.
I love you all, and for those of you who have no idea what the fuck is going on and are just wondering when I'm going to start posting pictures again I will appease you as soon as I can.