Tuesday, March 17, 2009

An Interesting Email

Helloooo out there. :)

So I'm supposed to be studying right now, but I just got my computer back after it died on me a few days ago, and I just feel obligated to use it. :) lol.

I just recieved an interesting email from someone I don't know asking me about like how to market themselves as a spanker to college girls. And I wrote him this very long response only to have it sent back to me as undeliverable :(. *Pout*. So, I thought, hey, it's an interesting topic, and I've been asked similar questions by men before, why not post the answer on your blog where he found you? So that's what I'm doing.

He is looking to be provide structure in the lives of college girls like myself who aren't doing as well as they should be, or are simply feeling astray, because of a lack of structure and accountablity. This of course, is a cause dear to my heart. Now, I have no idea if this person is a creeper or a genuinely nice guy, but I felt compelled to respond. Especially to the question of "you don't advertise directly on campus right...or do you?"

This whole thing is highly amusing to me mainly b/c its been a running joke with me and Edward since last summer, back when he was still the only man in my life, and the only one to ever have spanked me. As I've said on here before, I am very interested in spanking another girl (and probably switching with her as well) and that is something that I have not yet gotten to do (pout). But Edward and I made profiles on personal ad sites in order for me to find a girl. I still have them up, and while they are geared towards finding girls for me, I have found all of my male spankers, and both M and my current Daddy through these sites.

Edward and I used to joke though that we should offer a service. I'd be the secretary and he'd be the boss. I'd just get the ones that wanted a female top, or when he was too busy, or if I just thought they'd been especially naughty and I couldn't help myself. hehe. (my Daddy now is helping me look too, but he says that he's not sure he should give me a little girl to play with b/c he thinks I'd be mean to her! *gasp of outrage!* that is just NOT TRUE! I would be very nice to another girl! *hmph! stomps foot!*). Anywho, we used to joke that we'd advertise with a billboard that was of just a straightbacked chair and a hairbrush with a phone number. lol.

In all seriousness though, I would advise against advertsing directly on campus. That in my book is a BIG no. B/c someone will see it, misunderstand, report it, someone could get in trouble, etc. Secondly, its honestly kinda sketch. lol, sorry to use a teenage term, but that's what I would call it. I would not have replied to an ad like that- I would have been too afraid.

The best way, and the way that I've used, is through the internet, and spanking personal ads. My first spanking was almost a year ago now, and I found my Daddy through Shadow Lane personal ads. I just happend to be a member there, and I decided to be bold. I responded to Daddy's ad (which was actually over 2 years old- they still forward messages after you are no longer a member) and I put up one of my own. I obviously was very lucky. I got a winner my first shot up. I was not as cautious as a should have been, looking back on it, but it did all work out for the best.

Since then I have recieved a few messages from people responding to my ad (I have not been a member for almost a year), and I've become friends with some of them, met with one, but have not been spanked by any of them. Currently, and what I think your best bet it, I belong to multiple free spanking personal ad sites. The biggest one is Spanking Internet (SIN), which has both a free and pay area, and has 10s of thousands of members. There are a LOT of creepy, sketchy people on that site though, and it can be pretty overwhelming for a girl. But I think if you're upfront but not too direct or at all sexual, you could have some luck.

The other site that I reccomend is SpankFinder. It is much more detailed and cleaner than SIN, but also, unfortunately a lot smaller. I typically like the messages that I get there better though, and I have made quite a few friends there.

My advice for communicating and first starting communcation is to:
  1. Be Polite. This is big. I can not tell you how repulsive it is to get a message that is vulgar or presumptuous. Say that you liked her profile, maybe that her picture was very pretty, and that you would like to chat (most people use yahoo messenger or something simillar) or email with her if she's interested.
  2. If you're not interested in a sexual relationship, that is something you should mention. If a girl is just looking for discipline, that will be important to her (that was what I originally went in looking for).

  3. If you are comfortable sharing a photo of yourself, do . Don't put a picture of a really scary implement, or of you shirtless!!!!! Lol, I actually see that a lot, and I understand the point, but a full lenght picture fully clothed (even with the head cut off) is plenty. It will really up the number of messages you get. Even if you're super ripped and hot, you'll just seem shallow, and if you really shouldn't be shirtless...then you shouldn't be shirtless. ;)
  4. Don't be afraid. Don't be scared to send a message. As long as your polite, most girls will respond, and the worst she can say is no thank you. You'll never know what will happen til you try. However, DO NOT HARASS if someone doesn't reply to you or says no thank you.

  5. Lastly, If someone is listed as in a relationship, acknowledge that. I have always been listed as in a relationship and looking for girls on my ads, and yet I get tons of messages from men. The ones that I reply to, and make friends with, are the ones that say that they realize I am taken, but would still like to chat, or something of the sort.

Ok, lol, so that's my advice from my experience, which admitedly isn't much. I know that many of the people who read this blog *cough Todd and Suzy cough* have MUCH more experience than I do, and if you have anything you'd like to add to this, or change, pretty pretty please with sugar on top, post it in the comments. Comments make my world go round. :)

I hope I haven't sounded to pretentious in this post. I just really wanted that guy to get my reply even though his email doesn't work, and this topic is something that guys have asked me about a lot.

Next up, I promise, will be the story explaining all those brusises. But in order for me to avoid more, I need to go study! Love you all so much!!! And Thank YOU THANKYOU THANK YOU to everyone who sent me messages of support either here or through email. They really have made me feel so much better, and given me a lighter heart recently, which has been admittedly difficult lately.


Princess Kelly

PS. The photo is an old one (there are VERY few new photos from this semester *pout*) but its me in my "study panties." I thought they were appropriate.


  1. Kelly,

    Thanks for a great topic and an excellent post. Your suggestions apply to many situations. I sometimes receive e-mails that are very inappropriate (no, I really didn't need to see THAT). Then these guys have the nerve to write back and wonder why I didn't respond. On the other hand, if they are simply pleasant and respectful, I'm happy to converse.

    Good luck with your studying and all that follows!


  2. Great advice. Agree with every word of it... especially about using spanko friendly online sites. It's not impossible to stumble into a spanko in your day to day vanilla life... but actually *looking* there is a mistake. Like you pointed out, that can lead to real confusion and embarrassment.

    If someone... including a college student... wants the structure a good spanker can provide, they'll figure out where to look.

    Will say this too... you have to be yourself! Being open and honest about your wants, needs and desires really is the only way to go. Obviously get fewer responses by being specific, but the ones you do get will be deserving of your time and attention.

    Finally... if a spanker wants to help a college student... their heart really does need to be in the right place. If their motivation is a cheap thrill, it's better to go about it some other way. Lots of college girls like to play and have fun... be sexual, get naked, etc-etc. If that's your thing... be open about it... and don't try to get there through building a real discipline relationship.

    Great post,
    Todd & Suzy

  3. Yes on the advice, phew... people with sense in the world. As a girl who's single and on these sites... follow the above and you have loads more chance!

  4. Bonnie-
    Thanks for commenting! I hope all is going well, and to hear from you again soon!

    Todd and Suzy-
    I completely agree with everything you said. It is so important to be honest about both what you are looking for and who you are. Its easy for spankos to connect on some level just b/c we are all spankos, but its much harder to connect on a deeper level, and honesty is so important for that.

    Thanks for commenting and I hope to hear from ya'll again soon!

    Lol, amen!

    Princess Kelly