So I am having a weird day of ennui, and decided to get this post written while it popped into my head before I forget again!
This past Saturday was our local group's annual Christmas party, which could very easily be my favorite party of the year. In addition to the normal fun and shenanigans that we get into, we also do a "Naughty Santa" gift exchange which ends up being a riot, and this year was no exception.
So this was my first local party since the whole thing with Paul went down. I was kinda running it, but that is an entirely different discussion that will unfortunately never happen since everyone reads my blog, lol. Regardless, I thankfully had lots of help, and Mr. OMK took a bunch of the work on and so I got to really sit back and enjoy myself more than I usually do.
This was also my first local party not being Paul's date. My very first public spanking adventure ever was a bottoms UP party, and I was Paul's date. So there was a lot of significance to this event for me. There was a part of me that felt I needed to prove something- both to the group and to myself. I had to work hard to win over some of the people in this group- to prove I was something more than just another one of Paul's bimbo's. And I felt that I was going to have to prove again that I was worthwhile not only as a leader without him, but also just as a person. And there was certainly an aspect of proving it to myself- that Shadow Lane wasn't a fluke, and that I really can do this on my own.
Daddy talked about going with me, or at least making an appearance. He wanted to support me in whatever I am doing, but we eventually decided against it. Daddy is super BDSM, and the very casual, kinda loud, and super bratty atmosphere of Bottoms Up turned him off the last time he went (when we were first together back in February he made an appearance at a party and it was very stressful for both of us). I didn't want to end up putting pressure on myself to keep him happy to the detriment of my enjoyment, or simply for him to be unhappy. And for him, he thought it was very important that I went and showed myself that I could do it on my own. And show everyone else that I was strong on my own, and not a girl who always needed to be on a man's arm.
So! lol, I get to the party as the mixer is ending, right as everyone is heading upstairs, and there are a TON of people. The x-mas party is usually one of the largest events of the year, but there were at least 10 people there that I did not know, and that is not normal. It took me a while to get back into the swing of things, and to feel comfortable. I was very nervous- not sure what people would say or think, not sure what people knew or didn't know- but once again this group of amazing people proved themselves to be worthy of the title family. I was once again embraced with open arms, and things started flowing like nothing had changed. :)
But things for me have changed a lot in regards to spanking. I am in a BDSM relationship, not a spanking one, and while that has been wonderful and amazing and crazy and scary and erotic and exciting (I swear I will blog about this at some point!), I am a goddamn spanko! And I hadn't had a "proper" spanking since Shadow Lane on Labor Day Weekend!!! (this is from a girl who got spanked multiple times a day every day for a year and a half). Daddy gets upset sometimes when I say that I don't get spanked, given that he does smack my ass, lol, and I do receive corporal punishment as discipline, but to be fair, the man purposefully doesn't give me what he knows I want in terms of spanking just to fuck with me, lol, so he can't complain too much! I think if anything, this party just showed me how much of a spanko I am and always will be. :)
So I'm also at this point the day before my period, so super emotional and all needy and kinda little. And I was feeling guilty about an email I had sent to Mr. OMK, and about a bunch of other stuff, and I just really wanted a good spanking. Super traditional, over the knee, skirt up, panties down, firm hand on my bare bottom with lots of scolding. Unfortunately, I knew that would be hard to come by at the party since it is a playful environment, and because that sort of thing requires a lot of trust. I love these people and feel close enough to probably two of them to submit to that kind of thing, but those aren't the relationships we have. I want that from my Daddy, and it's really hard for me that I can't have that, but I'm learning to adapt...
Anywho, I just decided to have fun and let things go where they went. I have become much more relaxed about a lot of my limits lately, including those about markings, and I knew this was going to be my opportunity to play like this for a while, so I was wanting and willing to play hard. I normally end up topping primarily at these parties, and I did top and had a great time doing so, but decided to focus on bottoming (which to be frank, half way through the party, was a decision my headspace made for me), and have my needs met. :)
Ok, so onto the blow by blow (as best as I can remember) with fewer details but possibly more pictures? than normal:
NOTE: if I refer to you by the wrong name (ie scene name vs real name) or you would rather I remove mention of you, please let me know by email or text! :)
Oh dear god. I just started outlining this. I got spanked 10 separate times, spanked 2 people, and had two vanilla related things to talk about... that is going to come after work. :) For now, you will just have to be patient. ;)